One night, long long ago, on my long journey from home to downtown in the subway, without an internet connection, I was submerged in a very important notion: Why can't I go to Salad King for my first date? That place definitely has style, super tasty food, can sit face to face, escape easily if the other person is a psychopath and starts giving you hints about her hidden agenda, cheap Chinese beer, affordable, zero candles or similar shitty nuisance to come in between. So why not?
Before I start explaining the advantages and disadvantages, let me disclose the assumptions on which my hypothesis is based:
1) Salad king consistently maintains the good quality of food
2) No one is going above 5 spice (Trust me, those washrooms are not going to help)
3) Only half the stuff I say is stupid, offensive or rude
4) Everyone loves good food, even the grumpy cat
So here is the deal: Since I will be super busy eating the super tasty spicy Kari Chicken or Golden Curry (1 of them for sure), I won't be opening my mouth much. This reduces the probability of me saying stuffs like "Slow down, there is no competition" or "You do drink a lot, eh?" and by thus, increasing the probability of a second date.
Now coming to the other part of the first deal. Let’s assume I somehow manage to offend the person in front of me. There are 3 probable reactions I can get, of which 2 are good and 1 is OK.
1) She is so busy eating that she conveniently ignores the golden words I spoke and also, I take her death stare as a hint and do not repeat myself.
2) She notices what I hear and feels "something" for a second, but with all that tasty food in her mouth she decides to wait till she swallows it and then respond. By that time I "read" her face and come up with something "funny". Since "humans" cannot concentrate on 3 things at a time she forgets the first thing and will remember the funny stuff (refer assumption 3).
3) And in the worst case scenario, if the stupid stuff I said was really insulting like "How are you able to fit those butts on that small chair?” or "Did you spend your entire salary on today's makeup?", her anger will override her human instincts to eat tasty food and might just storm out after giving me the finger. In that case, thanks to the affordability of Salad King (Assumption 4), I can easily manage the bill without having to do the dishes for them.
Let me add: My dear friend, who recently got frustrated with the crowd here and decided to move to Kingston instead, would also want to point out that girls love to go to crowded places. It makes them feel "on the top"; so, what better place than Salad King?
On top of that, 5 minutes’ walk and we have "Elephant and Castle" for the brown wine that cures all wounds. So, if I ever successfully convince someone to go on a date with me, Salad King is the place!
PS: If anyone tries this and fails, it's because the third assumption is not applicable to you. You are just plan stupid.
Before I start explaining the advantages and disadvantages, let me disclose the assumptions on which my hypothesis is based:
1) Salad king consistently maintains the good quality of food
2) No one is going above 5 spice (Trust me, those washrooms are not going to help)
3) Only half the stuff I say is stupid, offensive or rude
4) Everyone loves good food, even the grumpy cat
So here is the deal: Since I will be super busy eating the super tasty spicy Kari Chicken or Golden Curry (1 of them for sure), I won't be opening my mouth much. This reduces the probability of me saying stuffs like "Slow down, there is no competition" or "You do drink a lot, eh?" and by thus, increasing the probability of a second date.
Now coming to the other part of the first deal. Let’s assume I somehow manage to offend the person in front of me. There are 3 probable reactions I can get, of which 2 are good and 1 is OK.
1) She is so busy eating that she conveniently ignores the golden words I spoke and also, I take her death stare as a hint and do not repeat myself.
2) She notices what I hear and feels "something" for a second, but with all that tasty food in her mouth she decides to wait till she swallows it and then respond. By that time I "read" her face and come up with something "funny". Since "humans" cannot concentrate on 3 things at a time she forgets the first thing and will remember the funny stuff (refer assumption 3).
3) And in the worst case scenario, if the stupid stuff I said was really insulting like "How are you able to fit those butts on that small chair?” or "Did you spend your entire salary on today's makeup?", her anger will override her human instincts to eat tasty food and might just storm out after giving me the finger. In that case, thanks to the affordability of Salad King (Assumption 4), I can easily manage the bill without having to do the dishes for them.
Let me add: My dear friend, who recently got frustrated with the crowd here and decided to move to Kingston instead, would also want to point out that girls love to go to crowded places. It makes them feel "on the top"; so, what better place than Salad King?
On top of that, 5 minutes’ walk and we have "Elephant and Castle" for the brown wine that cures all wounds. So, if I ever successfully convince someone to go on a date with me, Salad King is the place!
PS: If anyone tries this and fails, it's because the third assumption is not applicable to you. You are just plan stupid.
